For life's little ups and downs.

A rather quirky, funny and sometimes daunting look in to the life of someone who has a lot of health problems but does their best to keep positive. Punctuated by guinea pigs, anime, superheroes, transforming robots and cross stitching.

I started this blog to tell my story, about who I am and what I do. On top of the health problems and raising awareness for those, I also use my blog as a way to help promote other causes, particularly ones which affect the most vulnerable. I live with a number of different and complex health problems but I refuse to let anything get me down. I know how it feels to be discriminated against or thrown aside. This is me. This is my life. I live it and do what I want with it. Nature sets the limitations. We set the boundaries.

About Me:

A blog about life. I live with Bi-Polar Disorder, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder as well as Type 1 Brittle Asthma, Various Allergies, Neutropenia, Chronic IBS, Osteo and Rheumatoid Arthritis, PCOS and Osteoporosis and Heredetary Spastic Paraplegia. I live with these conditions, but I refuse to let them keep me down and out. I still try and make the most of my days despite being so poorly and having to rely on my wheelchair, nebulisers, nearly 50 pills a day and 2l/min of oxygen.

I'll flap my broken wings and erase it all someday... You'll see.

Saturday, 12 March 2011

The Truth, not always Beautiful, but always Right...

I think when you tell the truth, you should always be aware of the fall out, and seldom should someone feel awful about telling it. I guess sometimes I tend to wrap Steve up in cotton wool, because he never seems able to handle the reality of his situation, be it with his unemployment, his brother or other issues he has. At the end of the day, I can't always be there to protect him. I am not his mother. I am just an innocent bystander in a lot of this and I shouldn't be expected to try and play the hero when I can't manage to save myself.

I am tough at heart and I know my own mind, but in this one, I do struggle genuinely. There is the Luke situation which I know I cannot do much more than I have with. I have reported it to Social Services, but what he needs is his big brother to come and help him and Steve wasn't doing that. I needed to speak honestly and he needed to know where he was falling down. How could he have gotten back up when he didn't even understand where he was going wrong. It's hard, but I have a lot to deal with from day to day and I just want him to follow through with something more complex than a turd in the toilet, if you will excuse my crudeness.

Thing is, he is in a funk, which after being told that kind of truth, I do understand. I do. But I really fail to see where settling in to self pity is really going to help resolve the situation. The truth of it is, it WON'T. Been there, done that, got the T-Shirt and trust me, it really didn't get me anywhere. I wasn't suffering any more or less and I certainly didn't feel any better.

OK so some truth about what is happening to me at the moment. I am in constant pain and at the moment, breathing feels as though it is stiff. Like when you don't move your leg for ages, but its down at the bottom of my ribs and it hurts like mad all the time. I don't get much sleep unless I am drugged up on pain killers so I can breathe or taking a sleeping tablet just so I can switch off and forget the troubles of the day. I deal with a lot all at once and I forget to look after myself. But how can one be expected to look after themselves while looking after a 30 year old with the mental age of a 9 year old at times?

I think things do need to change and I know that the change has to come from him, and not me.

Loves
Wendy xx

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