Escape from the Alex...

Sounds like it should be an action flick doesn't it? Sadly it ended up looking more like an episode of Casualty without the blood and guts. OK so there was a little blood, but that was just from my IV line when it exploded then shut down. When an IV explodes, there is a sudden gush of blood, and usually I bleed through gauze after gauze. This time, the vein shut down and collapsed at the same time, so luckily there wasn't much blood, but my wrist is swollen and sore... Bad times...

I was there because my chest refused to play nice. It was so weird, I was a little off colour and tired, but I never expected such an attack. After 2 nebs at home, plus the hourlys I'd done all day, it soon became very obvious, I was not going to get any better. So Steve did the responsible thing and called 999 and got me an ambulance. I was whisked away, Oxygen driven neb on the go, to the hospital. Where I was given about 3 more nebs and some steroids. As well as more oxygen. I was really not improving and the doctor was running out of options. So we opted to try something that we had never done before. An infusion of 2g Magnesium and 250ml of 0.9% Saline solution direct in to the vein.

What amazed me was within an hour I was starting to really feel better. By 3 AM I was almost back to normal, however, I did start wheezing again when the doctor, funnily enough an old consultant who didn't believe in asthma, go figure, came to see me. We had a good banter and a laugh and he said I had looked a lot better and certainly sounded a lot better previously. I was given Prednisolone, Clarithromycin (antibiotic) and other medicines. I am now on rest orders, whether I like it or not, and I have to take it or I will have to spend more time back in hospital. As lovely as the staff are, I really can't afford to go back there for any period of time.

Thanks to everyone for the get well wishes. I will be back on my feet again soon :)

Loves
Wendy xx

Feeling off...

I guess by now, I would have really expected to have been feeling loads better by now and my asthma wouldn't be anywhere near as twitchy or a pain in the neck. I am feeling a bit better I will admit but its not as far along as I would have wanted to be. My Peak Flow has barely been over 250 l/min after a nebuliser and even as low as 90 l/min before hand. So you can imagine my frustration as I keep up with my regimen of pills, nebulisers and inhalers.

I'm barely eating much at the moment and all I seem to want to do is play on Sims 2, sleep and sew. The problem is, at the moment all of these seem to leave me shattered and even the smallest movements leave me gasping for breath. I can't lie on my left side at all right now or I can't breathe at all and am coughing up thick green mucus which I get the feeling that if it weren't for the saline, I wouldn't shift at all. I have my appointment with Dr Pike tomorrow so hopefully we can make a decision on this one as the fluid hasn't budged by itself yet, although it probably won't until the infection clears up. The kicker, this is the same infection I have been fighting since last month, but each course has just backed it down and its flared right back up again. I have had this before and it nearly resulted in an ITU admission which I really don't wish to be facing again.

I guess what this is, is a general answer to all those who are ask me how I feel right now, its so complex and its a nightmare to keep saying it over and over again when even typing 1 or 2 words make me feel shattered. I know its stark and I haven't pulled any punches, frankly, I find that pulling punches on this one would be for the good of no-one. I can't lie, I am still not well, and it is an up hill thing. One thing is for certain, I WILL GET THROUGH THIS. I always do.

*EDIT*
Went to see housing officer about the excessive noise problem which has made life miserable for myself and Steve, and he is going to investigate and take action against them and what they have been doing. On the downside, going out in the freezing cold and ice has left me decidedly worse for wear. Luckily I have an appointment tomorrow with Dr Pike, unfortunately means if I get worse, I have to either hold on for dear life or go to hospital. Whew!

Much Love
Wendy xx

Twitchy Veins...

To those of us who have a long term illness, there is one major certainty. Frequent medical tests. Urine tests, x-rays, scans, PFT's (pulmonary function tests) and my least favourite of all. Blood Tests. This morning I had one to check on my liver and glucose levels (2 of my medications cause diabetes so it was much better to be safe than sorry) as well as a full blood count. So off I toddled to my surgery and I waited in the nurse's waiting room.

Upon being called through by the Phlebotomy nurse, I got a sinking feeling as she examined my arms looking for a vein. This has never been easy. Instead I had to wait to see the Sister. She found a vein in my hand and stabbed it. After 40ml, the vein decided to give up the ghost and collapsed. Unfortunately this happens to me a lot and it is an uncomfortable occurrence. I felt bad for the poor nurse as she was very worried as she said she had never dealt with someone with veins like mine.

So now this means only a doctor can get blood from me, which means that blood work is going to be a pain, literally.

I don't get a fat lot of luck these days, but as always, I will keep a positive attitude and keep going as I have come so far in all of this.

Loves
Wendy x

Getting there...

I'm getting better, OK its a little slow and shaky but its progress. I know this sort of thing cannot be rushed really, but I can't wait to be back to my old, creative self. But this has given me time to meditate and plan some new ideas, even a Christmas card and a way of finally putting a lot of stuff in to words.

OK this will only make sense to some but I will try and explain it as best as possible. In the original Transformers cartoons from the 1980's there were groups on both sides called the Combiner Teams. Each one consisted of around 5 or 6 different robots, and sometimes these robots all had very different personalities and attitudes. The most extreme of cases was a robot called Menasor who was made from the Stunticons.

All of them hated each other and when they combined, they created this beast that was often so confused as to what it would do that individual parts acted independantly, but usually it was to the detriment of those around, friend or foe.

Now, I mention this, not for any sort of promotion for the Transformers, but as an analogy for medical teams. A lot of medical teams in the UK now-days work separately to help a patient, regardless of what other teams are doing and it leads to an awful lot of confusion. I guess what I am getting at here is that perhaps doctors and hospitals should liase with each other better and improve safety, and if there is a reason for treatments to be withheld, perhaps those reasons should be discussed with the patient. Maybe its that transparancy that is what is needed with the NHS these days.

And I go off on a tangent again, as I am liable to do. Right now, I have cannonballed a can of berry Relentless, chocolate and shortbread. I should be a lot more awake really, but right now am not and am really starting to think that this is unhealthy. A diet of high sugar and not much else, OK my weights dropped off, but I am either hyperactive and nuts or sleeping for hours, and even days on end. Need to get back in sync methinks...

Love you all
Wendy x