For life's little ups and downs.

A rather quirky, funny and sometimes daunting look in to the life of someone who has a lot of health problems but does their best to keep positive. Punctuated by guinea pigs, anime, superheroes, transforming robots and cross stitching.

I started this blog to tell my story, about who I am and what I do. On top of the health problems and raising awareness for those, I also use my blog as a way to help promote other causes, particularly ones which affect the most vulnerable. I live with a number of different and complex health problems but I refuse to let anything get me down. I know how it feels to be discriminated against or thrown aside. This is me. This is my life. I live it and do what I want with it. Nature sets the limitations. We set the boundaries.

About Me:

A blog about life. I live with Type 1 Brittle Asthma, Bi-Polar Disorder, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder as well as Various Allergies, Neutropenia, Crohns Disease (my IBS was rediagnosed as Crohns), Osteo and Rheumatoid Arthritis, PCOS and Osteoporosis and Heredetary Spastic Paraplegia. I have recently also been diagnosed with Sleep Apnea (which makes me stop breathing in my sleep) I live with these conditions, but I refuse to let them keep me down and out. I still try and make the most of my days despite being so poorly and having to rely on my wheelchair, nebulisers, nearly 50 pills a day and 2l/min of oxygen and CPAP.

I'll flap my broken wings and erase it all someday... You'll see.

Wednesday 9 March 2011

Forms...Forms... Forms...

You would thing that disability would be just one of those things, but I have spent the last 2 weeks filling out so many different kinds of forms for everything. From DLA, registering as disabled, care worker forms, OT. I swear my wrist gets a right work out at the moment, but its just so frustrating working out what exactly to put down and where it needs to go, who do I need to talk to? What do I do next? I think I have lost count on how many times I have had to explain what Brittle Asthma is, how it effects my day to day life and the 17, yes you did read that right, 17 different medications and other things I have to use and the machines and appliances that have become part of my life.

A lot of my time is spent on keeping me well enough to do the next bit. 20 minutes per time for a nebuliser or lining up an amount of pills is a lot to do. I want to get more of normal surroundings, rather than looking at another hospital room, having yet another needle inserted somewhere, or mask put on my face just so that I am able to breathe for a bit longer. At 23, knowing that this is something that cannot be cured, and won't just go away, knowing it will be something that is probably going to get worse with no way out, its the kind of thing you can't un-learn.

I have always looked at things in the best way and always pretended that things didn't bother me, and that I was coping, but that was the wrong approach to it all and it was no wonder that I was always crying when I was on my own, not wanting to admit that things were as bad as they are. I didn't notice the struggles to do simple things like making myself something to eat or drink, not that I wasn't struggling, I just saw it as I had done it so there we go. I hated myself for admitting to either myself or anyone else. I hated it even more having to tell my story to someone as they filled me a form in to explain how my health was and how I felt because of it.

I came back from my appointment somewhat down, maybe I was just smarting because it wasn't easy to admit how I was feeling here. I never ever looked at things in terms of "how sick am I?" or the rest of it, and it did leave me a bit crestfallen to know that I was actually in that state, the pale and exhausted young woman that looks back at me WAS me and I just need to make the best of it, stop running away.

Loves
Wendy xx

1 comment:

  1. Hi Wendy Its Gail from @dggreen on Twitter. I've been reading a little of your blog and I was wondering if you would be interested in writing a short piece for ours http://evergreennebulisers.blogspot.com/

    We started it late last year and it would be good to have a personal account from someone such as yourself with brittle asthma. It probably reads quite basic to you but the aim is to keep it general and short for people who are just beginning to need extra help whatever their chest condition. There are links for anyone who wishes to read further.

    Anyway if so you can email it to nigel@evergreen-nebulizers.co.uk and I'll publish it this end. Hope you're feeling a little brighter

    ReplyDelete

Thanks for your comment. I will review it as soon as possible!

Labels

ABG (2) acceptance (5) Adventures (1) Alphonse (2) Ambulances (5) Amusement (1) Angry (3) Animals (2) Another Day In Midgar (2) Appointment (1) Art (4) Asthma (22) Asthma Attack (12) Asthma UK (2) Awareness (2) Bad Attitudes (1) Bass (1) Benefits (3) Birthdays (3) Blogs (2) Blood Pressure (1) Books (1) Bucket List (1) Busy Day (2) Calming (1) Catherine (2) Childhood (2) Chocobo (1) Christmas (4) Cleaning (2) Close Calls (1) cold (1) Comforter (1) Compensation (2) Creativity (1) Cruelty (1) Custody (1) Cute (1) death (3) Debt (2) Depression (4) Design (1) diary (1) Disability (1) Disgust (1) Disney (1) Distraction (2) Doctors (4) documentary (1) Dr Pike (1) Dreams (1) Drugs (1) DWP (1) Dye (1) Eating Patterns (1) ESA (1) Exhaustion (3) fair share (1) family (1) Films (1) Final Fantasy 7 (5) Flu (2) Fluid (1) Food (1) Friends (7) Gaming (2) Gizmo (2) glass half full (3) goodbye (1) GP (5) guidelines (1) Guiniea Pigs (6) Guitar (1) Hair (1) happiness (6) haters (1) Help (1) HND (2) home (3) home use (1) Honesty (3) Hope (4) Hospitals (8) Housework (1) Human Nature (1) Illness (5) Infection (5) inspiration (1) Instincts (1) Joke (1) JP (2) Judy (1) Labas (1) Life (2) lost cause (1) love (1) Luke (1) Lungs (3) Lush (1) Me (2) Medication (7) Memories (1) Mike (1) Mind (1) MSN (1) Music (6) My Past (1) Nathaniel (1) Nebuliser (8) Needles (1) neglect (2) Neighbor (2) new look (2) New year (1) NHS (2) Noise (5) Omen Shadow (2) One day's supply (1) Organ Donation (1) Pain (3) Patch (1) PDSA (1) Poem (1) Positivity (1) Pred (3) quotes (1) Rachael Wakefield (1) Rachy (1) Random ideas (1) Rant (1) Recovery (7) reinvention (2) Reporting (1) Routines (1) sad (1) salmonella (1) scared (1) Sean (1) Selfishness (1) Sephiroth (4) Sephy (3) Simon's Cat (1) Sims 2 (1) Sleep (6) Sorting it Out (1) Spite (1) Steve (1) Store Room (1) success (1) Support (2) Survival (4) Tattoos (1) tears (1) Technology (1) Temparature (1) Thank You (4) The Crow (1) Therapy (1) Thoughts (1) Thrash (1) Tired (1) Toys (1) Transformers (1) Transplant (1) Veins (1) Vomiting (1) warnings (1) West Midlands Ambulance Service (2) winter (1) work (1) Year (1)