Happy! Just spent a WHOLE week with Bex. It was freaking awesome even if we stayed in eating junk food all day (and I don't seem to gain a pound, probably all the crazy dancing and the fact that I am completely hyperactive at the best of times). Since getting myself a new camera (a rather sexy one at that) I've been taking so many photos of my antics and the things I get up to because its been so funny. The one with the Kunai in my mouth has to be one of my favourite shots as of late. That came about when I was just bouncing around the flat in one of my hyper moods and then I saw my Kunai model sat on the bookcase, I couldn't resist grabbing my "Anti Konoha" headband and my "Akatsuki" cosplay cloak and throwing the shot together. It was one of those "Spurr of the moment" kind of things and it ended up being such a cute picture. And for the record the Kunai knife is a PLASTIC prop and it didn't taste that good!
I really have been getting in to my cosplay and my art just lately and it's been so cathartic to just lose myself in a drawing for hours at a time. My bubble is such a calm and beautiful place and the home I have is so reflective of that. It keeps me inspired and in those moments of weakness, I can laugh and feel better about the situation or as my nan would say "make the best of a bad job". In all honesty though, I have set myself up (with so much help from Penny and Tom, to whom I am always grateful to) with a comfortable and relaxed way of life. I do admittedly live like a student, but I am going back to being one over the next few years.
A life without regrets. This is so important to me, now so more than before. Since Rachy died and nearly losing Penny over Christmas and now hearing about Andrea as well, I am reminded of how fragile life is and how important it is to live, laugh, love and remember to breathe. Smile happily and let the world see that you are not weakened by others. Don't let your self-esteem come from other people but draw it from yourself and everything that is YOU. Be an individual because thats what makes you shine. Even if theres something you hate about yourself, chances are that there is someone out there who will love you so much that little thing may not even matter.
There was a lot about myself that I hated. I was fat. I was depressed and I was sick. But being around Becky has shown me that even in the bad times you can still laugh about something. OK so we laughed after I'd had an Asthma Attack on the toilet, but it was funny because of the randomness then we ended up bouncing around for ages playing "Hide and Seek" with the plushies, then watching Tactics for ages. I've watched all my Naruto Shippuden DVDs and now have to wait till the end of February for the next box set to be released. But that will be anticipated happily and then watched to death like the others!!
3 years ago