After a few weeks of it being completely up in the air, it has been lovely to finally get some clarity in everything around me. I had been re-assessing my life and the people I had let in there. Cutting away the ones that made it their purpose to make other people feel sad, alone or any other way that I had let these people get to me. It was a control thing because they were probably feeling the lack of control in their own lives. Things just lately seem to have come so easy for me. Even if that had only been because of a year of hard work and feeling as though I'd never get there.
After hitting rock bottom last winter, I emailed my local social services team for physical disability, and I opened up explaining how I had been feeling. I also worked out how it was that I managed to avoid the medical for my ESA, it was actually quite simple. They had actually written to my hospital doctors and they had come through for me by telling them exactly how unwell I'd really been. At the time I had expected to be cast aside as had been the case oh so many times before. Upon accessing the service, I was able to get the care and support to help me. Please do not judge me too harshly unless you have lived a day in my shoes.
I guess thats why this blog was originally started, not as a "what is annoying me today" or "how my boyfriend is behaving" and my worry would be that it would be all this would be read for. Not the original purpose, and that purpose was to tell people exactly what it has been like to live with this condition and maybe give those who really have no idea what happens in asthma and the people whose lives have been affected by it.
Today was one of my easier days thanks to some extra pred and some rest between jobs and chores. I managed to vacuum the living room for once and it looks a damn sight better than it did and I am pleased with how things have turned out for me. And my home looks fantastic for my hard work. I will get to work soon about all my collection now it has all been placed in the right way and is all in different parts of the room, adding colour and style.
I will get that done a bit later and I hope it will be enjoyed as it is a rather large and rather impressive collection that I have here and it still grows to this day. With a few pieces left to acquire and of course place when they arrive here. Right now the only things my collection need are:
Advent Children Play Arts Tifa
Advent Children Sculpture Arts Cloud
Static Arts Cloud
Master Arms Cerberus
Other Final Fantasy games Play Arts
Dissidia Play Arts (Kai)
Final Fantasy Crystal Chronicles
Final Fantasy VI
Final Fantasy IX
Final Fantasy X-2
Final Fantasy XI
Final Fantasy XIII-2 - Not released yet
Kingdom Hearts 1
Kingdom Hearts: Birth By Sleep
Kingdom Hearts DS Games
The rest of the Kingdom Hearts Manga
The rest of the Kingdom Hearts Figures
Which when you consider that I have as much as I do, to get the rest of the stuff shouldn't take anywhere near as long as it had been when I had sidelined my collection for a while due to the home situation and not having the space for the rest of it. Its a large amount of collectables and its such a fun hobby (albeit an expensive one) to have.
2 years ago