Since cleaning the metal contact pins on my nebuliser, it's almost like having my old, reliable friend back. It's only when something like that starts to play up that you really notice just how much you need that piece of equipment and how much of a part of your life it really is. This piece of machinery has been a valuable lifeline ever since that day that I brought it from Lloyd's Pharmacy. I remember well what the alternative was, carrying around one of my other driving machines (a heavy piece of equipment which could run on a battery, which even then it didn't hold much of a charge and would only be able to do about 2.5ml of solution at a time and was very noisy, for someone who doesn't like to draw attention to themselves, it was counter productive). I had been shown this thing by Penny who showed me the biggest advantage of it being how quiet it is. Since then, my Omron Microair has never been too far away from my reach. I have used it on buses, in cafes and even on trains or lying in bed or on the sofa.
It is almost as vital to my life as my scooter or my other medications and things to help me to live as well as possible. There are days when I find it hard to get out of bed because walking from one room to the next is just a recipe for a spell of heavy wheezing and a barking cough that can rattle the windows. Sometimes, I can be alright with something like a light spritz of perfume or a passing smoker, other times these can be a huge trigger and it takes time to settle things back down. I think it's the variable nature of my condition that really gets us off guard. I'm hoping that with the change of seasons, things will be a bit easier and I will be able to enjoy the better weather and the golden summer days.
I'd be lying if I said I was where I wanted to be at the age of 25, but I do think that as a result, I have been able to connect with people who I have become very fond of. I have a stable relationship which has now blissfully lasted for over a year, Jace doesn't mind my physical or mental problems, in fact they're just a part of me that we all just accept. If I want to sleep all day, Becky and Jace know the best thing to do is leave me to it and if I am really struggling, then they know what the best things to do are. We are a team and if anything, what ever gets thrown at us only serves to make our bonds stronger and brings us all closer. I only wish I had met them both sooner and maybe some of the less than pleasant aspects of life could have been avoided, but perhaps this only stands to test my belief. Everything happens for a reason.
Gatsby and Edward are settling in to their new home well and they are already friendly with all the other guinea pigs. Kadaj is slowly losing his ASBO reputation (I remember when we first crossed paths and his aggression, especially towards the other guinea pigs) but now he really is a reformed character. I caught this snap of him a few days ago when he was happily vegging out in the hay while Gatsby was playing in their little box house. The way he looked up when he saw I had my camera out and was looking to get a picture of this adorable little creature. He is a mummy's boy, completely, and hes become a rather chunky boy too. I am glad to see how he's thriving, a far cry from that skinny, terrified little boy who came to live with Gizmo. It's still raw to have lost Gizzy as well as Zell in less than 12 weeks of each other. We didn't see either death coming, Zell died as a result of a freak accident because he was spooked by the people upstairs being so loud. We both grieved hard for that baby. The house seems so quiet without him here. Gizmo's death was one of the hardest as he was only 2 years old and no one saw it coming, he was fine one moment, on his back having a stroke the next. Kadaj felt it the most I think as Gizmo was his cagemate and best friend. You never really saw one without the other, but hes really taken Gatsby under his wing and they are getting on well together. Tenzou is still cautious of Edward, but he and Kibou have really gotten close. So I guess it isn't all bad.
I guess here would be a good note to finish on, knowing that everything is just wonderfully happy and we are ready to face the next set of challenges with grace, dignity and courage. The world can bring it on and we'll just carry on as normal and stop anything from going wrong.
4 years ago