After the last week, I have been almost floating and have not been able to stop smiling like someone has injected me with sunshine. I am so incredibly happy and its not something that I thought I would ever find again. I have had relationships where the other person wasn't who he seemed, or relationships that left me a shell of my former self. Since my last relationship, I was left feeling so depressed and miserable that I had been so sure that I would never fall in love again.
I was wrong. So very wrong. The day after my birthday last year someone so special and wonderful came in to my life. He didn't turn it upside down, but he was there for me when I needed it. He listened when I was upset or in pain from my shattered elbow (and my shattered pride) and with Becky, he helped to rebuild me from that. I have two people in my life who are so important to me. And yes, I did meet them online (shock!) and contrary to what one person believes, I have been able to maintain a face to face relationships with them and other people in my life.
I can shout it out proudly. I am in love with someone who makes me feel so safe and loved. The people who hurt me are now little more than morose shadows which no longer burden me. One of my biggest mistakes was allowing my past to ruin my future and letting what other people do affect me. It would have been way too easy to run away and deny my feelings, but that would have hurt everyone. And frankly that is really not my style. I'm not afraid to admit that I am in love with someone and that person makes me feel like the luckiest lady in the world.
"I will not stray, I will trust this love and with it I will keep on living" - Kesenai Tsumi (Nana Kitade)
I never understood the meaning of those words until now and I love Jace deeply and with all of my heart. I also wish to thank Becky for the wonderful photo that she took of the two of us on Tuesday.
2 years ago