There have been some weird goings on at times, but I sometimes just brush it off and put it down to experience, from there I can move on and just pick myself back up and move forward. It's kind of how I have always been and it is probably how I have survived as long as this, well that and my lack of patience with idiots or childish "he said/she said". It is more productive in my view to just say "yeah, OK, everyone makes mistakes", get over it and move on. I am glad to say that I have managed to do so with many aspects of my life, saying "goodbye" to the people who are either intent on causing trouble or are too cowardly to say what that want to to my face. I don't need that and I won't actually put up with it, and frankly it is their loss.
Aside from that, I think some forgiveness is due to the doctors. We had to try a new approach on my recurrent chest infections. The norm has been throwing one kind of antibiotic at it and repeat for as long as it takes. Sometimes this didn't work and the infections started to get more severe and well we all know what the result of that was really. I so applaud the fact that the doctor did want to try something new that my body wouldn't have had the chance to become resistant to, that was good, and no one could have anticipated that I was going to react to that particular antibiotic the way I did. A bumpy rash on my neck and spending most of the morning with my head down the loo! I don't think I have ever been that violently sick with very little inside me... We want to try and get through the weekend and see the doctor on Monday once the reaction has gone, if not then... well I guess the rest is history really.
Today, I also received a claim pack to renew my DLA. All I have really had to do is fill it in, say what, if anything has changed since the last time and mention any new things that have popped up over the last couple of years. It's not a fun process at the best of times. The form, for anyone who has never seen one or had to fill one, is a daunting thing. It is 36 pages of complex and awkward questions that you have to be 100% honest about and say exactly what life is like. You also have some questions that repeat, almost in a way to catch you out and fluster you. Its a minefield of a form and often takes up to 2-3 hours to fill in. It took us 3 hours today, just wading through and answering the questions, OK so I wasn't as drained as I was when I first filled one in, but I was a bit put out afterwards, and my wrist felt like it was made of spaghetti!
I allowed myself a nice, relaxing afternoon, finishing a small project I had started a week ago. You see, my Sephy doll has been there for me when I have needed just to snuggle up, squeeze or just confide in when I have felt scared or upset over the years. I know it sounds really silly, but I have sometimes managed to talk to my plush Sephiroth doll about things that otherwise would have been either ignored or judged harshly. I know hes an inanimate object, but to me, its like having a constant companion and one who won't tell a soul what you said or how you felt. We all find a way of coping and to me, this is my way. Judge me all you like, because honestly, I don't care if you find it weird or not. But I digress, I had been working on a new jacket and maybe even some new shoes for Sephy as his originals are starting to look a bit worse for wear after 5 years, over 200 hospital trips (approx), probably 1000 miles of travel (approx) and many MANY parties and sleepovers. I managed to finish sewing his new black jacket, made out of PVC from some old boots which I could no longer wear due to injuries to my feet. Soon I will make his armour from some silver PVC and sew them on. As well as working on a Sephiroth Cross Stitch project, based on his original artwork from the FF7 game (back in 1997).
2 years ago