This is a year of personal growth and it has gone so well, I've learned so much about myself and it's allowed me to grow strong and regain my own independence and self worth. I am better than I gave myself credit for. More ambitious, and more full of that spark and energy that endeared me to so many people in the first place. To lose that fire was horrible and its never something I want to lose again. I'm full of life and living up to the max, as best I can in my circumstances.
My carer helps me so much and she understands the level of clean thats needed to keep myself at least healthy. My health is fragile and that is the unfortunate reality. There is a reason why I get DLA and I have a carer helping me, and now I have to take care of myself and my own needs. To keep myself that person that I love. I have discovered a liking to having a nice hot bath, a mug of hot chocolate or tea and powering down with a game on my PSP while lying in bed, before I become so relaxed that my eyes close and I become embroiled in my dreams.
I wake up in my own time and I love it when I go in to my living room and see my 4 guinea pigs all happy and ready for a fuss and some love. Gaara is settling on his own finally and isn't screeching so much whenever I get off the sofa. It's a learning curve for him as well as one for me.
2012 is going to hold travel and Anime Conventions. Getting away for a few days (of course with someone to feed my pets for me) and seeing the country and meeting the friends I have met over the last year and of course making more friends wherever I go. Its a big thing for me to go and have some fun and meet new people. I love that feeling when you meet someone new and they're interesting, and have their own accent. My ultimate dream is to go to Japan and maybe get some work experience in teaching English. So I am hoping to go back to college to learn a new language.
I feel born again. Admittedly I still have that day when I feel so ill and can't do a lot, and the people who help me recover are so incredible. They support me. They make sure that I keep my spirits up and they help me make wise choices with fiances and other things. I really feel like I'm getting back on track, I know I may never be as well as I was back then, but you know what, having the strength to do what I want to do even with a chronic sickness is what makes me special.
2 years ago